When this photo showed up in my feed a few days ago, it made me smile…not because of my expression, but because of seeing how far I have come since then.
I like to think of myself as a body positive activist. However, even I have times where I doubt myself and pick myself apart. It feels like society is set up for self-hate. With summer upon us, my Facebook feed has been flooded by self-hate memes for not having a “beach ready” body and having arms that are too fat to be seen in public. There are so many women that are going to spend this summer either miserable and sweating because they are wearing layers because they are afraid someone is going to make fun of their bodies. There are women that will not go to the pool because they have been programmed by society to feel that they need to be able to present the “perfect body” in order to enjoy some sun and splash time.
Why do we do this to ourselves? No matter what size we are, we are not going to be everyone’s cup of tea! Even if I wake up tomorrow magically skinny, there will be something else about me that I am supposed to hate, according to haters on the internet. I don’t feel that I owe it to the internet to not enjoy the summer because of ridiculous standards. I spent years not wearing tank tops or cute dresses. I refrained from wearing a swimsuit in public because I was afraid of what some ignoramus might say. Do I know that I am fat? Yes, yes I do. Does it make me worth less as a person? No. No it does not.
I know I have said it before, and I am going to say it again. Whether or not, we get down to the perfect size, it is okay to love ourselves as we are right now. It is okay to be you. It is okay to enjoy life, and honestly, it will make you feel better about yourself. The more we bash ourselves and put ourselves down, the more we are just feeding into other people’s expectations. If you want to lose weight, that is fine. I am not saying you should not. I am saying that you should not think less of yourself because your weight, your butt, your boobs, your arms, your tummy, or (insert anything here) does not fit the mold.
This summer, I challenge you to be bold. I challenge you to hold your head high. I challenge you to hold yourself to different standards than what we are being brainwashed to believe. Wear what you want. Do what you want. Be what you want, but above all…LOVE YOURSELF WHILE DOING IT!
*All photos were taken by Victor Devilbliss with MUAH by Making Faces Professional Make Up
When you are plus-size, you may hear how you should wear dark colors. “They are slimming,” people say. Well…I say, “Screw that!”
Put some light and fun color into your life!
It is that time of year, where we are just on the cusp of summer, meaning that I start out in a cardi, and I want a tank top by the end of the day. I found these cute boot cut jeans at Torrid on clearance a while back. I always wear darker colors for jeans, but at $15, I could not pass these up! I am glad I did not because these jeans are seriously cute, and I like how they look on me.
Speaking of things I do not usually try, I found the BMO cardigan on clearance at Hot Topic. I almost did not get it, but it is super cute, and I love having something lightweight like this for the beginning of summer. Also, who doesn’t like Adventure Time?
The babydoll tank came from Rue 21. You may have heard they are restructuring. I am so glad that none of my local stores are closing. They have seriously cute clothes! Also, the quality has vastly improved since my teenage years. They have a great selection of plus-size clothing now, up to a size 24 and could seriously be a contender in the plus size market. Also, they have Rue bucks going on now, and well you can use them on pretty much anything during redemption. Let’s just say that I love this store!
I even have a bag to match the ensemble, thanks to Thirty-One Gifts. The “All About the Benjamins” wallet is like the TARDIS of wallets! I own an LG V20 because I tend to use it as a tablet more than a phone. I read on this thing! It is freaking huge! It also fits in this wallet, along with my cards and even my checkbook (and currently crayons. Don’t ask!) It is pretty awesome.
While the tank is a bit of a darker blue, it is a bit out of my usual style because it has white on it, and I am a bit of a mess at times. I love the lighter jeans and the cardigan. It inspired me to get a few more lighter colors for summer. I am even shooting with a lighter colored dress in a few weeks!
My point of all of this today is this: don’t get stuck in a rut of staying within the norms, especially if you are plus size! There are so many fun colors out there, and you will look fabulous!
What is something you have done that is out of the norm with fashion recently? I would love to hear about it! Don’t forget to share and follow my blog for more plus size fashion, beauty, and pin-up adventures!
I saw this meme going around Facebook asking, “Why is every other girl my age 1000% prettier than me?” It broke my heart. As someone who has dealt with body image issues in the past, I just want to hug these girls that think this and say that you are just as beautiful as the other girls.
With social media being so prevalent in our every day lives, more and more of us are subjected to this kind of bull shit every day. There are the stupid challenges, like the one where the perfect body size is dictated by whether or not you can touch fingers when you put them around your waist. We are inundated with fad diets and afraid that if we wear the wrong thing in public, we may end up on someone’s Tumblr account for being a beached whale.
The thing is that beauty is a relative term. The things I might find beautiful, others may not. When we let society dictate that only one type is beautiful…whether that be skinny, fat, or somewhere in between, we are telling everyone else that they are not. We are all beautiful. Each one of us is unique. Just because you do not fit into someone’s box of what beauty is doesn’t make you any less spectacular than you are.
It is high time that we as women start to remember this and fight back against society’s shaming. We need to stand up against the magazine articles and ugly media. We need to support our skinny sisters and our thick sisters. We need to stand together and tell society and the media to take their standards and shove them up their asses. It is so easy to criticize ones self. Next time, you start thinking you are not worthy, remind yourself that you are awesome and go flaunt your stuff. If someone doesn’t like it, well they are the ones that have their own issues to work out, not you.
Go out and be awesome. Spread the word, compliment one another, and let’s end this shit together!